This Is Why

We are having a baby. Drew and me. The Huddlestons.
peanut 10 weeks

It’s been hard to put these words on the internet.
#1 These words are hard to take back.
#2 I don’t know why I deserve this good news and others don’t. (I really am my mother’s child.)
#3 My brain has been adversely affected by hormones. Exhibit A:

16 March 2011, 8.47pm
I think I need to lie down. There is a blue line. I had a glass of wine before I took the test. I will never forgive myself if anything goes wrong.

16 April 2011, 5.35pm
I feel horrible. Good news. In four more weeks I will consider getting excited.

27 April 2011, 2:00pm
I just got the most fantastic news–my best friend on the planet is having a baby! The details are fuzzy, but he is going to let me do the birth part thing. (It turns out that this is a lot of work.) As you can imagine, this has all been pretty emotional for me… In fact, I think I will eat a spoonful of peanut butter and cry for a minute. (This peanut butter would be divine on Oreos.) I have to add tissues to the grocery list.

28 April 2011, 10.30am
He is going to be such a good daddy–and he is being so incredibly sweet to me. This is a sure sign he understands better than me what I have committed to regarding this whole giving birth thing. (I have noticed I am really fat. Must get to the gym.) People at work are starting to look concerned about this maternity leave thing–yes, I really would like to work until my water breaks. Note to self: this is something Americans say which has no direct translation in UK-speak. (I wonder if there is any ginger ale hidden in the fridge).

30 April 2011, 4:17pm
It’s dawning on me that I am happy for me, too, but it is honestly a bit of shock that there are two people in my body so I am focusing on Drew’s big news for a moment… Besides, I am feeling kind of sick. It was probably the Oreos (or the olives). (Or the wrinkled Peanut dancing on my bladder.) I need a nap.

24 May 3:46pm
I am having a baby! Holy crap. (I wonder if pickles would be good dipped in ketchup. Probably. As soon as I stop feeling sick I am going to try that.) I have to make a list. And a schedule. And snuggle the baby’s daddy. Oh my God, my best friend is having and baby–and it’s mine, too! Whoa. (I wonder if Drew will kill zombies with me later.)

11 responses to “This Is Why”

  1. Thanks very much Jess-it has been a struggle to find the right time (and there has not been a right way) to share the news. We are over the moon when we aren’t in disbelief… Every day I wish this happiness on other special people I know are ready for it. Love to you!

  2. You do deserve good news and good “life things” in general!
    I love your journal of feelings, and I’m glad it’s all feeling very real now 🙂
    I can’t wait to see you holding little peanut!

  3. AHHHHH!!!!! Congratulations! I am so excited for you guys. (And a little jealous. I was hoping you’d adopt me.) I can’t wait to hear updates! More exclamation points!!!!

  4. Such a cute first picture!!! Let me know when you find out girl or boy! I’m so excited that we are due so close together. When you are back in the states, definitely call me and we’ll go get a cup of, um….. hot chocolate? Heh. See you soon!

  5. We will know the sex when the baby comes out… It’s not common in the UK to be told the sex before the baby comes. Very sad why, but it’s a very international place with all different views on the value of having one over the other… Not me of course. I am getting very excited about having one last surprise at the end.

  6. Much love and congratulations to you both! If anyone I know deserves this kind of a blessing, it’s you two. I guess we really do need to catch up! At the very least, you’ll get an email from me soon.

    I love you! And best of luck on this latest adventure 🙂

  7. Hmmmmmm, you must have been mistaken on April 16th. Clearly, because I was there and I can’t imagine why anyone would feel horrible in my presence. It’s just not physically possible.

  8. Thanks again everyone for the well wishes. We are so excited and overwhelmed… Maybe I speak for just me? Maybe Drew is as cool as a cucumber?

    Oh Taylor, I can tell you that since conception I have no longer been in control of what goes on in this body. And my body reminds of this every day.